FALLING APART IN PUBLIC

Back From the bogs
Mad box of frogs
With the Christmas dos
And the yuletide blogs
I’m falling apart in public

Some two bit tit
And her thripny bit
Want to shoot the shit
About the pitfalls of going viral
The inevitable downward spiral
Silver bells! I’m falling apart in public

Way off kilter, smoking the filter
Down to its nub
Can you tell the difference between the sick and the grub?
Pulling up roots at the bar
With a bowl of bruised fruit
Dozing on the couch
With a yard full of grouch
I’m falling apart in public

Pull me a cracker Jack
Ever seen Mac in the knack?
Leaves the mouth a little dry and the jaw a little slack
“Man you can’t say that”
I’m falling apart in public

Little drummer boy won’t let me play with his toys
And the lamb and the oxen
Are just days that need boxing
Taking a swing at glad tidings
Lech and leer at a dress full of cheer
That giggles and swoons
Under the smear of a moon
I’m falling apart in public

Ding dong bell
Here comes Mr show and tell
With a pithy joke and a cheap noel
All Cuban heels and wish me wells
Joining the round with the hand me downs
I’m falling apart in public

Dry that twiglet’s tears
Allay those finger bowl fears
More dreams on the back of an envelope
Wood worm and belly rot
Bombing schemes and terror plots
I’m falling apart in public

It’s a revolving door for the puerile
A refectory for the senile
The toilet bowl of resolutions
Creaking age old institutions
This barrel of fish need shooting
I’m falling apart in public

How many lords were leaping?
Sycophants creeping?
Friends left weeping?
Its grey skies and mourning suits
Gold rings and dying roots
I’m falling apart in public

It’s the star of fucking David
All coked up and wayward
Full of vinegar and piss
A pantomime hiss, and a misseltoe kiss
But the kiddies don’t scare about the step on the stair
The crash of sleigh bells that the neighbours know well
But I’m falling apart in public

Pa rup a pum pum
Get your fill and leave em the crumbs
The tongue tingles and the gums are numb
A Christmas fist full of two front teeth
Its aint the paper its what’s beneath
But I’m falling apart in public

That goose got fat off of penniless twats like me and you
Glam Peado flares, racists charging triple fares
Holly and Ivy, drunk and conniving
The mince pies, the maggots
The bar sings “cheap lousy faggot”
O tannebaum!
I’m falling apart in public

A grope with the girl from HR
One last whisky before I’m barred
Hail down a sleigh and follow that car

Fill it up to the brim
No room at the Inn
Down here I’m Tiny Tim
A Shrivelled up Scrooge
With just the present to lose
I’m falling apart in public

The black mass midnight choir
Sing songs from the witching hour
It’s away with the stranger
All clear, present, danger
Somewhere between the stars and the gutter
With a tongue that cuts butter
Its mud sticking, boot licking
Shit kicking, house bricking
It’s begging and pleading
Moaning and bleating
It’s all the best and season’s beatings
All the best and season’s beatings
I’m falling apart in public.